The Joys of My Life…

Since I began writing, my children are always asking me to write about them. So, this morning, I decided to let you meet my joys…my three precious children!

Blake is my oldest child. He is 14 years old, and he stands about 6’2” tall! I don’t have any idea how he became such a giant! He sure didn’t inherit those genes from my family!

Blake is one of those kids that has this dry sense of humor. His mind is sharp, and you never know when something will come out of his mouth that just leaves you rolling on the floor laughing!

A few weeks ago, Blake was fighting allergies and asthma issues. As he swallowed yet another pill, he looked at his little sister and asked, “Cassie, can you swallow pills? I could swallow pills at your age.”

Knowing that it took FOREVER to get this child to swallow a pill, I looked at him and said, “Blake, do you know where liars go?”

Without missing a beat, he says, “Yeah…the White House.”

No matter where you are on the political spectrum, THAT IS FUNNY!

On the first day of school, I had managed to get all three kids in the car ON TIME! When I got to the car, I couldn’t find my phone. I went back inside to look for it. I began calling my number, listening for the ring. Finally, in exasperation, I went to the car without it. As I opened the car door, Blake said, “Oh, I found it.”

I thought absolutely nothing of the exchange…until later in the day. As I reviewed a text to my friend, I noticed something strange.

That turkey had put a shortcut on my phone! Every time I typed the word “and,” my phone changed it to “I like the smell of monkey butts.”

Blake also learned about physics at a very early age. When he was around eleven years old, we were on a ride at the local amusement park. The ride, known as the Schooner, is a large ship that swings back and forth. He was sitting with my niece at one end while his sister and I were on the other end.

Blake got the brilliant idea that he would spit a loogie. Unfortunately, he decided to spit it at the top of the ride…and it hit HIM in the face!

My second child is my tender-hearted eleven year-old, Cole. He apparently DID inherit his height gene from my family—which is not a good thing for a young boy.

When Cole was about four years old, I walked by the bathroom to find him looking in the mirror. As he brushed his hair, he seemed to be admiring his reflection. He began to sing, “Handsome dude. Handsome dude. Handsome, handsome, handsome dude.”

It was such a sweet site, and it definitely made me laugh! To be honest, he probably got his humility gene from my family, too!

When Cole was three years old, we were at a new church interviewing for the position of pastor. While we were having lunch with some leaders from the church, Cole went to the bathroom.

From the boys’ bathroom, I hear a little voice yell, “Mom.” As I got up from lunch to go into the mens’ restroom, I thought that had to be the worst part of the situation.

“Hey, Mom,” Cole said proudly, “my poop looks like Larry the Cucumber.”

Oh, the joys of raising my kids with Veggie Tales!

Cassie is my angel, my drama queen, my one child who thrives on being the center of attention. My parents were having a party one evening with their church friends. Unbeknownst to me, my daughter made her way to their house (we live next door).

The next morning, my dad told me that Cassie had been the hit of the party! Apparently, she had taken her hula hoop over to show off her skills. But, that wasn’t enough for her.

After demonstrating how to hula hoop, she pointed at one of the guests and said, “Now it’s your turn.” One by one, these 70 year old senior adults were chosen to try their hand at hula hooping. They still talk about how much fun they had that night!

When Cassie was only three, we were driving to a birthday party. It was a cold December day, and my kids were talking about what they wanted for Christmas. My boys began to sing All I Want for Christmas is…, but instead of wanting their two front teeth, they substituted whatever was on their Christmas wish list.

Suddenly, my precious daughter began to join the singing with her own version of the song: “All I want for Christmas is some big boobies…”

And, that is the only thing that was on her Christmas wish list that year.

Only a few short weeks after my divorce was finalized, we were praying together as a family. Our hearts were broken, and the pain had taken a toll on us all. We were adjusting to our new lives, and our hearts were heavy.

As we sat together on my bed to pray, my daughter voiced her concerns to God.

“Lord, please bring my mom a sexy, sexy man to marry,” she said innocently.

As we all began to laugh, I had to ask if she knew what “sexy” meant. Although she said no, she flipped through my Facebook friends. There she found a picture of a man, shirtless and buff, standing on the beach.

“That’s sexy,” she said.

OK. Maybe she couldn’t verbalize what sexy is, but she certainly knows it when she sees it.

Today, she has modified her prayer slightly. She now prays for a godly, athletic, sexy, rich, smart, involved man who will love us very much. And, only bald men need apply…

THAT is definitely the influence of my family genetics…

So many days I look at my kids and laugh. Other days, I find myself short and irritated with them. Perhaps they have left their shoes and socks in the living room again or they are fighting with their siblings. Maybe they’ve not obeyed me the way I want them to or they’ve forgotten to brush their teeth again. Perhaps they procrastinated on a school project and we are frantically trying to complete it before bedtime.

The truth is, my kids are a HUGE blessing from God! I am so thankful to share my life with these amazing little guys who have big hearts and a great sense of humor. I love watching them grow and mature, and I love seeing their tenderness and compassion for others develop. I love to see the world through their eyes.

I’m not really sure where I would be without them.

Thank you, Lord, for blessing my life with these amazing kids. My life is so much richer, so much more fun because of them. Help me to be a good steward with them. I pray that my love for you would be caught as we go through this life. Grow them into God-honoring kingdom changers!