As I reflect on my life, I am blessed to even be alive.
I was born May 23 (we will skip the year). The doctor said that my due date was May 6, but my mom swears to this day that her due date was April 6. She began having labor pains on March 26, pains that were dismissed by her doctor as my mom not knowing what she was talking about (despite having two children before me).
When they finally decided to induce labor, Mom quickly got into trouble. Every time they rolled her onto her back, her blood pressure plummeted. The doctor realized he was in way over his head, and he called in another doctor.
When Dr. Coggins came in and examined my mom, he immediately said there was no way she could ever deliver me. He needed to do an emergency c-section. He walked out into the waiting area to talk to my dad (this was the time when men were not allowed in the delivery room). He looked Dad in the eye and said, “I’m going to try to save your wife. If your child survives, she will most likely have severe brain damage.”
Shortly thereafter, I was born. I was purple from lack of oxygen.
My mom was unconscious for five days.
And yet, despite my “brain damage,” I developed as a normal baby. I graduated at the top of my class in high school and earned a college scholarship. And, despite the doctor’s warnings, my mom went on to have another child—my little brother who is today a successful dentist. Just goes to show that medical science is not always correct, that no plan of God can ever be thwarted.
You see, God had a plan, and no doctor’s incompetence could ever prevent him from accomplishing his purpose with my life.
You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. Psalm 139:16 NLT
There is something comforting about knowing that God saw me and cared for me so cautiously even before I was born. There’s something about knowing that every moment—good and bad—was laid out before a single day had passed. It’s a mystery that I will never fully understand this side of heaven, one that brings the collision of God’s sovereignty with man’s free will to the forefront.
There has always been a part of me that has clung to the dire circumstances into which I was born, knowing that God has a purpose for my life. He has a reason for me to be on this earth. As I continue to seek his will for my life, his plans for me continue to unfold. I want 2015 to be the year where we come full circle, where his power pours out in my life to open doors that clearly show me the path to his greater plans.
There are certain purposes that I know: to glorify God in all I say and do, to lead my children to be fully devoted followers of Christ, to encourage and build up the body of Christ. But, the specifics have yet to come together with 100% clarity.
But one thing I know:
For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:10 NLT
God didn’t create us to live a simple, mundane life. He didn’t create us to simply exist. He says that he wants us to have an abundant life (John 10:10)!
He says that he has good things planned for us, things he planned out long ago…even before we were born.
Maybe you didn’t have a dramatic entrance into this world to which you can cling to believe God has a great purpose. But, you do have scripture to tell you those things. Notice that God says we are all his masterpiece! He has great things planned for you just as he does for me!
Your journey is different from mine because God is a God of individuality and creativity. He wants to take your personal circumstances and use them to create a beautiful future just for you, to create you into the masterpiece and good works he has planned just for you. He wants to take all of the good, the bad, and the ugly in your life and weave it together into an amazing portrait of his redemption. He wants you to take that story and use it to point the world back to him, to glorify him for making all things good (Romans 8:28).
I don’t know your story. Maybe it’s simple, unexciting (or so you think). Remember, God wants you to live fully, abundantly! Dig in and find his purpose, your passion.
Maybe your story is one of pain, abandonment. God allowed you to survive, to come through the darkness. Now, he wants to use your pain for his glory, to create a beautiful redemption story.
Maybe your story is one of rejection, self-hatred, loathing. God wants to bind up your wounds, heal your broken heart. He wants to make you brand new, redeem your life, use you mightily for his kingdom.
It doesn’t matter what your story is. If you release it to God, he will take it and mold it into a beautiful picture. He will give your life meaning, purpose. It may not be an overnight transformation. It may not be a quick revelation of his plan. But, he will use you, make you into something you never imagined.
Lord Jesus, let this year be the year that your full revelation of your purpose for my life is revealed. My life is yours—every single part of it. I believe that you created me for a greater purpose. I submit to your plan, trusting that your plans for my life are far greater than anything I could ever ask or imagine.