I am blessed to call a sweet lady, Holly, friend. She found me on Facebook shortly after I started writing. Over the last two years, she has shared portions of her life with me, a life that has been marked by walking in the flesh, feeding the lusts of the flesh instead of walking in the spirit.

However, today she is a shining light for all the world to see! She is a life transformed by the grace of Christ. She is a beauty, seeking to find her purpose and passion in this life through her love for Christ.

I have so enjoyed seeing Holly point the world back to Christ! When she asked me about sharing her story, I was thrilled to have her guest post on my blog! So, without further introduction, here is Holly’s story:

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I regret my past and the decisions that I’ve made. I dated ruthlessly and carelessly. I’ve done things I am not proud of. I partook of college activities that you never deem yourself doing when you’re a 14 year old girl. I have lived shamelessly in my past. From the outside looking in, it would be easy to deem me as someone who is the girl you want to stay away from.

Now, I’m 28, newly single, and building my future with prayer and a whole lot of Jesus.

I’ve dated my fair share of guys in the church. None of the relationships lasted or worked out. Why? Because I was searching for something only Jesus can FREELY give me. A wholeness and newness, acceptance that I can only get from Him. I was looking for an acceptance that I was not able to get as a little girl. My father died at an early age, and I was raised by a single mom. I had a void in my heart.  A huge void. A void that I didn’t know was there…until after I made the decision to marry. That marriage was quickly followed by divorce.

It. Hurt.

I’m not perfect. But Jesus is. John 14:6 says that Jesus is the way, the Truth, and the Life, and no one comes to the Father except through him.

Jesus is Life.

He has given me a new life in Him. My Refuge is also in Jesus, (Psalm 34:22) and my Hope is in him (1 Peter 1:3). I am telling you, no matter the hurt you’ve experienced, you have a new life in Jesus. A new life that can’t be justified—because we do not deserve the blood that was shed for us at Calvary (Hebrews 9:12).

I have learned a lot. I am seeking Jesus daily for His direction and insight into my life. I hope one day to be happily married to a man who sees my past as redeemed and my sins washed clean; white as snow…because they are (Isaiah 1:18). I want you to know, whether you are a man or woman, single, newly single, God has a plan for you.

If you have been hurt and walked through a whole lot of mess, it’s okay. God’s got It! He’s going to use you, transform you, mold you, and make you into the Masterpiece He has created you to be (Ephesians 2:10)! Don’t lose hope. Stay focused. Remain in prayer. And surrender your entire heart to our precious Lord Jesus Christ.

And be ready for the adventure he is planning for you! He Loves You!

 

14 replies
  1. Becky D.
    Becky D. says:

    Dena, I read your article about your divorce for God’s Glory. That is the most encouraging article I have read yet. I am recently divorced from an abusive marriage. I am trying to come to terms with this as I too was a Christian and tried to make the marriage work. What do you do if the husband is unrepentant and denies ever abusing you and blames you for ruining his life? He was never repentant toward anything in our six years of marriage….always felt like nothing was resolved, never said I’m sorry. How do you get over the hurt, forgive someone that has a hardened heart towards God (even though he knows about God) and makes me feel like everything was my fault? I have a lovely 2 year old son and long to heal my heart. It’s been two years but still a cloud of sadness covers me. I desire that the Lord will give me a new freedom in Christ. Can’t break thru yet. Thank you for your article…you have a gift…continue to use it for His glory.

    Reply
    • denacyd
      denacyd says:

      Becky, I understand. We are living in a society where personal responsibility is at an all-time low. My divorce was all my fault…according to him. But, I have come to terms with the truth. While I have to evaluate my life and determine where I failed, I also had to come to a realization that I was living with a sick man. It has taken me six years to overcome the anger and bitterness and be able to truly pray for God to bless him and to forgive him. And some days it is still hard. I wish my book was finished because I will be addressing this all in more detail. But, perhaps a few pointers. 1. You have to learn what the Bible has to say about you: you are beautiful, chosen, loved, cherished, a masterpiece. You have to believe what he says about you. You have to change your internal dialogue to reach a place where you see yourself through his eyes. 2. You have to see your ex-husband through God’s eyes, as a helpless, harassed sheep in need of a Savior. Recognize that his mind is deceived, that he is in desperate need of help. Pray that God would change the way you see him. 3. Make a daily decision to walk in forgiveness. Every day, ask for a supernatural filling of his forgiveness and compassion. Ask that his love would fill you and overcome any anger and bitterness. 4. Decide to thrive! God called us to an abundant life, not a mediocre life. Decide today that you will live with gusto, pursuing his full purpose for your life. Determine that you will learn to overcome so that your precious son will see an overcomer. Believe that God has great plans for you!

      Being broken is your opportunity to start over and shine! He will take your ordinary life and make it extraordinary!

      Reply
      • Becky D.
        Becky D. says:

        Thank you Dena for your reply to my comment I left last night. I will keep in mind what you have said. The enemy puts lies in our heads and we battle things in our mind that can control us. But, yet, Christ is our overcomer. I feel like you were right here listening to me, thanks so much for taking the time. The Lord can speak to us through people and through his word. Can’t wait to read your book. May God give you the wisdom as you finish it. Would love to meet you some day. I pray that my anger and bitterness will fade soon. Listening to God’s voice has been hard for me lately. Enjoy your precious children. Thank you for ministering to me. :)Becky

      • denacyd
        denacyd says:

        Those early days are hard to listen to him. The radio was my saving grace. I could listen to my Christian station and hear God’s words to me when I couldn’t pray or read his word. It’s making the effort to make small changes. Praying his blessings over you today!

  2. Zenia
    Zenia says:

    Hi holly my name is Zenia i was a Christian but i back slide .I’m a single mom with 2 handsome boys and i lost my father 4\6\14 . I had my won place and lost that too, then moved in with family members , some are Christian but they wanted me live like christ like them. It was to much. And the other part of family is african my sister my one and its much. But i told them i need my own place. O found one and got it . I just want to see christ on my own.like it used to be. Am i wrong?

    Reply
    • denacyd
      denacyd says:

      Christ came to set us free. You must seek him, follow him to the best of your ability. If you are confused as to how you should live, your primary rule should be love God, love yourself, love others. If you are doing those three things, you are fulfilling all the law and the prophets. Many times, other people place heavy burdens on our necks from human interpretations of scripture. Seek God and let him lead you. Praying that you find the peace that surpasses all understanding!

      Reply
  3. Caterina Davis
    Caterina Davis says:

    Loved reading your story, I’ve been separated from my husband for 13 months and I just don’t understand and feel lost, I left because of his mental abuse, I had to move states because he is a police man, I hope and pray I will get to where you are one day.

    Reply
    • denacyd
      denacyd says:

      Caterina, I’m so sorry! Just know that there is hope! Cling to God. Be amazed as you see him provide for your every need, heal your every hurt. Watch your faith grow! One day, you will be able to tell your story, to comfort others with the comfort you have received! Praying God’s abundant blessings and protections over you!

      Reply
  4. Maame
    Maame says:

    Thank you Holly for your story. Most of all we give thanks to our Lord and savior Jesus Christ for his grace and mercy. Our yesterday is not counted against us, each new day called TODAY is a day of renewness and hope. Our tomorrow is being molded and shaped By our father in heaven.

    Reply

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