Tag Archive for: abuse

Just Leave

Throughout my years of writing about divorce, I have advocated for men and women who have found themselves in toxic and destructive marriages. Since I write from a Christian perspective, I often find people holding to the sanctity of marriage. I have no problem with that. I am a firm believer in one man, one […]

Does God Truly Redeem?

“Are you truly happy?” That was the question posed to me earlier this week in a conversation with a friend facing divorce after a decades-long marriage. It’s the fear of the unknown that creates so much anxiety, even when the marriage was unbelievably difficult, fraught with betrayal and pain of the deepest kind. Will I […]

Should I Stay?

It’s a question I am asked frequently: Should I stay in my marriage? It’s also a question I wrestled with for a very long time after I discovered my first husband’s infidelity. I had made a covenant before God and man, and it wasn’t something I took lightly. I had always been taught that scripture […]

Four Things to Remember When You Have Been Hurt by the Church

I read a Facebook post by a friend recently, and it absolutely broke my heart. In the post, he talked about all the ways he has been hurt by the Church. By the congregations that shamed him when his marriage fell apart. By the pastor who fired him when people responded to his message. By […]

What Makes a Marriage, Part 2

Before I dive into the rest of the interview with Gary Thomas, I want to say a few things. I have already written about Married Sex, Gary’s latest book written with Debra Fileta. Sadly, many of you have heard many negative and critical comments about it. It is so important that we refuse to take words […]

What Makes a Marriage?

Gary Thomas has become one of my favorite authors and marriage mentors. There was a time when I didn’t feel this way, mostly because his book Sacred Marriage was used as a weapon to tell me I should have stayed in my marriage. While I agree that marriage is sacred and divorce should never be […]

4 Lessons From Lysa Terkeurst’s Divorce Announcement

Three years ago, Lysa Terkeurst and her husband stood before man and God and renewed their vows following a painful separation after infidelity. They gave so much hope to those walking the painful journey of infidelity, a reminder that God is able. And God truly is able. He is able to heal the most broken […]

One Size Does Not Fit All

One size does not fit all. I recently republished a post about purity. In it, I mentioned the book Every Young Man’s Battle. A reader asked me to do some research and look into the damage this book has done to marriages and families, and she put a link to a video by Sheila Wray […]

A Tale of Two Adulterers

The more I talk with people who have walked the dark path of adultery, the more I realize not all affairs are the same. I have a dear friend who walked the dark, painful days of adultery with me. Her husband had been a pastor at a local church when he had an affair. Through […]

Fighting Myths

Sometimes I feel like a broken record. I recently read a Facebook post in a Christian group. The author was asking a question about how and when to explain to the kids the reasons behind the divorce, namely adultery. Most of the comments—whether right or wrong—were kind and gracious. Until that one person had to […]